Winter's Night

On a cold Winter's night, I looked over at you. I could see your profile, barely illuminated by the kitchen light. It was dark, but I could see each feature of your face as if it were perfect daylight. I have your beautiful face memorized. I gaze at you often, and I see it in my dreams most every night. You were playing your game, and you looked content.

At that moment, I fell in love with you again for the hundredth time.

It's not that I've ever stopped loving you, but there are moments when I am overwhelmed. The same feeling I had when I first realised I love you swells up and crashes into me like a tidal wave. I can't breathe, there is joy that you're here, and there is fear that you won't be. Then you look over and smile at me. I can see in your eyes that the smile is real, and it's for me alone. Your smile, your touch, your kiss make everything alright.

As the last few hours of 2010 tick down, I can't help but think about the things that happened to us separately, the things that have damaged us and hurt us. While I know they are all things that brought us to this point in time, I still wish they didn't have to happen. I'm a little bit sorry to see this year end. It is the year that brought you to me, and the year I moved home. It's the year I found what true friendship is, and the year that gave me kinship. But it started with the taint of an old life. I lost a lot. While much of it was definitely for the best, there are things I can keenly feel the loss of.

On this eve of the new year, I am looking forward to a fresh page on the calendar. This coming year will see us celebrating our first year together. It will see us continue to build our life together, and further our wonderful relationship. I am looking forward to this next year of our life, and every year. I will love you for each and every day, and many of those days will find me falling in love with you yet again. For that I am so thankful.

There are other things I'm looking forward to the new year for as well, but I'll get into them another day.